JenderJosh

I ran from a possible three way, not a three way itself.

Boy, that entry sure got a lot of comments.

My roommate and I were at Splash and a man propositioned us. I told him I was “married”, and left for the nearest subway. Whatever he and my roommate did after that is their business.

I went home to sleep.

I literally ran - RAN - from a three way tonight. I love New York. I love how gay New York is. It’s great. But having some Italian man grab my hand, put it on his crotch, and then ask, “Is this big enough for you?” is enough to cause me to run to the nearest F train and pray for the subway to deliver me from the madness that my life has become.

JMG has a preview of a current Newsweek cover story on Lawrence King discusses gay kids coming out at a younger age and “defining the limits of tolerance” in public schools.

What you might call “the shrinking closet” is arguably a major factor in Larry’s death. Even as homosexuality has become more accepted, the prospect of being openly gay in middle school raises a troubling set of issues. Kids may want to express who they are, but they are playing grown-up without fully knowing what that means. At the same time, teachers and parents are often uncomfortable dealing with sexual issues in children so young. Schools are caught in between. How do you protect legitimate, personal expression while preventing inappropriate, sometimes harmful, behavior? Larry King was, admittedly, a problematical test case: he was a troubled child who flaunted his sexuality and wielded it like a weapon—it was often his first line of defense. But his story sheds light on the difficulty of defining the limits of tolerance.

According to a study cited in the story, today’s gay kids are coming out to their parents at an average age of 14. Just like me!

I was so ahead of my time.

Andrew to his girlfriend:

“I’m not drunk, I’m just really high. There’s a difference.”

NSFW.

As an avid follower or Camille Paglia’s writings, I continue to be dismayed by her comments regarding homosexuality. She strays away from traditional rhetoric of being “born that way” and emphasizes the importance of choice, which I find praiseworthy. That is, you can’t choose your attractions, and no matter their origins, we need to respect people’s right to choose how to live their lives. If she stopped there, I would completely agree with her. But she continues to assume that heterosexuality is the default attraction for everyone, and homosexuality some kind of an “adaptation” taken on in childhood to deal with the pain of being different and interested in the arts.

Huh?

I just think it’s silly and overly complicated. Can’t some people just be gay? Paglia criticizes post-structuralist claptrap, but then relies on it to explain the origins of homosexuality - especially male homosexuality. All theoretical musings aside, some animals have sex with other animals of the same sex, and they don’t have tragic childhoods.

I think Paglia is unwilling to step outside her own box and recognize that she comes from a generation where homosexuality was ultimately wrong and sinful, and must always be pathologized.

Can’t gay people just “be”?

Thoughts, comments anyone? Here is the link, as well as the full text of Paglia’s comments.

Subject: “Turning Gay?” … Really?

I am an avid reader of your Salon columns. However, in your most recent effort, you flippantly employ a stereotype that is not only insulting but patently homophobic. Please refrain from reinforcing this tired notion that has been used repeatedly to justify discrimination (and, far too often, violence) against gay men.

In my entire life I have never once met someone who “turned gay” as a result of dissatisfaction with the opposite gender. Nor have I seen any reliable scientific evidence to suggest that this phenomenon exists anywhere outside the delusions of those who believe homosexual feelings and identity are “treatable.”

Donald Solomon
Raleigh, NC

You raise a variety of important issues, for which I thank you. In alluding in my last column to young men “turning gay” in our present climate of banal, mechanistic, faux-sexual femininity, I was speaking from my experience as a social observer as well as a cultural historian of sexuality. I’m sorry if my remarks seemed “flippant,” but it must be remembered that my sense of humor was forged by gay men (from Oscar Wilde to “Auntie Mame”). When flippancy goes, the gay world will be a mighty dreary place.

In any area of my work, if what I see conforms to a past stereotype, my conclusion is that the current model of analysis requires reassessment. Surely the truth about human nature must be our ultimate goal. Intimidation of or violence against anyone, gay or straight, of course cannot be tolerated in civil society. But to make so direct a connection (as gay activists persistently did in the ’90s) between free inquiry and homophobic oppression is worrisome.

The decision by the American Psychiatric Association in 1973 to remove homosexuality from its list of mental disorders was a major advance in civil liberties. But an unfortunate result, reinforced by the new trend of post-structuralism (which sees human beings as entirely shaped by covert political forces), was the waning of psychological insight into personality formation. There are a myriad of factors at work there that require a nearly novelistic aptitude to detect and dissect.

I have said many times before that I do not believe homosexuality is inborn but that it is an adaptation to specific circumstances and possibilities. What many gay men are remembering as their innate gayness was in fact some other attribute (often an artistic gene) that may have led to a dislocation from roughhousing male bonding. The sex instinct, which comes later, is in my view heavily symbolic among human beings. (Post-structuralism, among its many pathetic flaws, is helpless with symbolism.)

Once the symbolism of erotic attraction is deeply implanted in the brain, it is almost impossible to change it. And in a just society, sexual orientation would not be subject to such pressures anyhow. Everyone, in my strong opinion, has the potential for bisexual response and expression. Hence I think both exclusive heterosexuality and exclusive homosexuality do need to be “explained.” I understand the biological imperative of hormones, which drive male and female to mate and reproduce. But why is anyone entirely gay? It seems incontrovertible to me that at root there is indeed a dissatisfaction of some kind with the opposite sex, grounded in early experiences and reinforced in adolescence. There is not a single gay person whom I have known over the course of my life since high school for whom childhood factors played no role whatever in his or her adult choice. And yes, behavior is a choice, even if fantasy and imagination are uncontrollable.

Marvel has just given official confirmation that Jean Grey is back. Isn’t lil Phoenix cute?

She has always been my favorite comic book character, both literally and metaphorically. She’s essentially the Marvel version of the god Shiva, who holds the drum of creation in one hand, and the fire of destruction in the other. All while dancing the Tandava - the dance in which the universe is created, maintained, and resolved.

It totally made my day. Jean died five ago when Magneto hit her with a lethal “electro-magentic pulse” that caused her to have a massive stroke and die. Her last words to Cyclops were, “All I ever do is die on you…” Ha!

Then Wolverine cut off Magneto’s head.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is true love.

Oh, and Cable looks kinda hot in this cover drawn by Mark Silvestri.

Hey, everybody needs a hobby!

I’ve spent the last two hours wading through a 72 page lawsuit and breaking it down for my boss. She has to get up at 5 AM to do an interview and she doesn’t have time to read a document that big. Besides, she knows everything anyway!

Oh, and let me be clear about this. I found the story late Monday night, sent it in, and a producer wrote the text. I don’t want to take the credit for his work. It does feel good though to find a big story and get it on the air when it might have been overlooked otherwise.

Probe: Justice Dept. Vetted Applicants for Political Beliefs